I am a student of Class 9. I am very disturbed these days. I like a guy and I think about him all the time. We chat on a social networking site. I know that I should not think about him but I cannot control myself and it’s affecting my studies. Please help me.
You sound quite distressed about not being able to control your thoughts about this boy. Liking and daydreaming about someone at this age is normal; instead of controlling your thoughts, manage them effectively.
First, build self-discipline. Set study goals and time for study. Focus on your studies in several 20 to 30-minute slots with a 5 to 10-minute break between each. Set a reward for yourself when you achieve the day’s study goal. If your mind begins to drift off, remind yourself of both your goal, and your reward after you accomplish the goal. Use the 5-4-3-2-1 method when you begin to think too much: Notice 5 things you can see, touch any 4 things, listen to, and hear any 3 sounds, become aware of any 2 smells around you and acknowledge any one thing that you can taste. And then get back to whatever you are doing.
Set aside separate time for social media. When chatting, stick to the time limit and come back to your tasks. Most of all, do follow cyber-safety measures when you chat – even with known persons; do avoid talking to strangers.
Include different kinds of activities in your routine: Help your mother at home with the housework, pursue a hobby – a craft or an art of your choice, exercise or pursue a sport. These will help improve your focus too. Do some social work such as teaching a younger kid. Focus on your friendships as well. Remember, self discipline is important for success.
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