My Science School

I'm 17 and one of my friends loves the same boy as I do. He's our mutual friend and he knows about our feelings. At first he said we are equal for him but gradually he fell in love with me. We are in a relationship but my friend is really hurt. Have I done the right thing getting committed to him?

Hi dear, love is built on the free decision of two persons to enter into a committed relationship. As that boy is the mutual friend also of your girlfriend, he has to explain to her what has happened and what he feels towards you. You did not rob her boyfriend; it was he, in the first place, who "gradually fell in love" with you. Let him speak frankly to her. Is he willing to do that?

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I love a girl who lives in my colony; she is my friend. I never expressed my feelings to her. I really can't live without her but I am also aware that she loves someone else who is my best friend. What should I do?

Hi Dear, if you are not able to express your feelings to that girl yet can't live without her (in spite of knowing that she loves someone else, your best friend), you are emotionally confused and immature; this happens frequently during the teenage. If you do not want to lose the friendship of your best friend and of that girl, respect their feelings and continue being just a good friend and nothing more.

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My dad is going through a financial problem since we recently bought a new flat. I am not able to take up various activities because of this. He never says anything, but I know he wants to fulfil all our wishes. My parents and my sister never tell me anything. They think I'm still too young to understand, but I'm sure I will understand. What should I do?

Dear girl, your dad loves you very much and does not want you to be upset or worried by the financial problems of the family. I am sure he can handle them, though he may not be able to, at this moment, to fulfil all the wishes of his children. Tell him that you appreciate his efforts and sacrifices and that what you really need is his love and not material things. The new flat in which you will live with your family is proof of his love and care.

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I recently entered Std XI in my own school. Almost all of my old friends have left the school. Now I rarely know anyone and I've tried hard to make new friends but the group with whom I have my tiffin break are a bunch of new girls who were friends in their old school. They ignore me or whisper to each other in front of me making me feel uncomfortable. I asked if they have any problem with me on any issue. They said it was nothing. One day what happened broke me down completely. During the break when I went to have my tiffin with them they deliberately moved away on seeing me. For a while it looked as if I was chasing them so I gave them place to move away. Later I approached them but they told me to go away as they had some personal talks. There are two other girls with whom I could have my tiffin but they are not of my mentality, so it's almost impossible to stay with them. I have not told my parents about this but I don't want to stay in this school. My parents don't support me on this issue and are forcing me to stay in this school. I am mentally and psychologically broken down. I cannot concentrate in class and become irritated for no reason. Whenever I sit quietly these thoughts haunt me. Please help.

Dear son,  friendship is a beautiful relationship of mutual trust the grows with time. You seem to be a in a  hurry to build new friendships, even before knowing well  the “ bunch of new girls” that have come to your school. Have patience; give them time to slowly come to understand you and appreciate you. In the meantime, have your tiffin  with the other two girls, whom you say “ are not of my mentality”. Be humble and kind to them; you might realize that they are not at all bad and could actually become good friends. You also made the mistakes of not telling your parents about this situation. They too can advise and help you in taking the right decision about changing your school.

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