My Science School

Tour managers are responsible for accompanying tours from beginning to end. They play an integral part in ensuring their clients’ tour experience meets their expectation. A professional course in tour management will help you understand the nuances of the job. Many institutes offer short-term courses in tour management. Preference is given to applicants who are well-travelled. The knowledge of a foreign language also helps in securing admission. Usually, tour guides get most of their training on the job, as most travel agencies train their tour operators at least for two months before sending them on solo trips. The finer tricks of the trade are learnt by assisting senior tour mangers, observing them while they manoeuvre and make the trip exciting for travellers. Eligibility for these courses is graduation. Since you are in class VII, at present, just focus on your current studies and do well.

 

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The first step is to take Mathematics and Physics in 10+2. There are not many universities in India which offer an undergraduate programme in Astronomy, so you should go for B.Sc. (Hons.) in Physics. Then go for M.Sc. followed by Ph.D.; this will enable you to become an astronomer. If you are keen on joining ISRO, then one of the modes is through Indian Institute of Space Science and Technology (IIST), Trivandrum. IIST offers 4-year B.Tech. programmes and 5-year dual degree programmes and admission is on the basis of your score in the JEE Advance examination. After completion of the programme, students, on the basis of merit, are absorbed by ISRO.

 

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In order to become an IAS Officer, you must apply for the civil services examination conducted by the UPSC. It consists of three stages: preliminary, mains and interview. The basic eligibility is graduation in any field. This examination is one of the toughest and requires thorough preparation. Clear your basics first; NCRT books will help you. Start reading The Hindu or Indian Express every day. Don’t just focus on trivial facts or details. Go through the editorials and try looking at the issues with an unbiased mindset. Also subscribe to magazines like Yojana, Kurukshetra, India Today, Frontline, Competition and Success Review, etc., for deep insights. Work on your vocabulary and improve your communication skills. Though real preparation starts while doing graduation, these suggestions will help you to improve your general knowledge.

 

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I am 14 years old. My mother allowed me to join Facebook, but once she opened my profile and saw that many of my friends were boys. She scolded me for making boys my friends but I know all of them. Now she doesn’t let me use the internet and Facebook. She thinks that I will grow up and have many boyfriends but seriously they’re just my friends. How can I get my mother to trust me?

You’re quite upset that your mother doesn’t approve of you being friends with boys on Facebook; nor does she trust how you will behave with them despite trying to reassure her that they are just friends.

It is good if all the people who are your ‘Friends’ on Facebook, are people you personally know and you are following cyber safety rules. What could make your mother comfortable is that perhaps she doesn’t know all of them. She probably didn’t even realise that them may be girls on your friends list as well.

A great way to build trust with your parents is to first reassure them that you have friends of both genders. Then, talk to them about your friends – both girls and boys. Share some snippets of their personalities, your common interests, their family background, and so on. As a teenager, you may want to keep your conversations with your friends private, but that shouldn’t stop you from sharing information about your friends with your parents. When you are open and relaxed with your parents, trust grows between you.

 

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My favourite teachers are now retired. I am very much connected to them. I was completely upset since the moment I heard that they were leaving the school. Whenever I open the books of their subjects, my eyes will fill with tears. I am very depressed because of this. I neither pay attention to what my new teacher is teaching nor do I talk to anyone. I don’t know how to bring them back. I am nothing without them. This year I have to appear for my boards and I am completely ignoring my studies. I’ve talked to my principal about this, but she said that there’s no possibility. I still feel that there are some chances of bringing them back but I don’t know how to do this. I just want my teachers back as nobody else can take their place in my life. What should I do?

You feel so much love for your teachers and miss them so much! They are quite lucky that you care for them and have such a high regard for them. So, please don’t do your favourite teachers a disservice by mourning that they are not there. Instead think of what they would have wanted you to be – even without their presence!

Your teachers would certainly have liked you to study well and excel. Think of it – if you set a goal to get great results, work hard and achieve it, and then go meet your teachers with that result – they will be so proud of you!

Cherish what these wonderful teachers have taught you and the foundation that they have given you. You have to part with your teachers sometime but what you carry with you throughout your life is their love and the values they have instilled in you…no one take that away ever!

 

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I am in class 10. Last year, I proposed to a girl. She accepted my proposal but after six months, she broke up with me. I was heartbroken and depressed for a month after that. But I still have feelings for her. Now she is talking with me and her friends told me that she wants to propose to me. What should I do? Accept or reject her?

It must have been quite a difficult time for you when the girl that you liked broke up with you. You say that you still have feelings for her, but you are a bit confused about whether to accept or reject her, sounds like you feel happy that she wants to propose to you but you are also worried that if she has changed her mind once and broken up with you, she may do so again.

Sometimes, when one is confused, a good thing to do is to take it easy and focus on something else. Right now you’re in Class 10 and throwing yourself into board exam work will give you a sense of purpose. You could continue to be friends with this girl, and it will be clear as to whether she is serious about you, or is going to change her mind all over again.

 

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I was good in studies but nowadays I find that I am not able to concentrate on them. There is a rumour in school that I have multiple crushes on senior girls. Though I know it is not true I just can’t go about it. How will I prove to people that I do not have crushes on my seniors?

You must be feeling quite embarrassed that such rumours are being spread about you. There is usually no smoke without a fire. So, first it would be good to do a little self reflection – do you idolize or hero-worship any of the seniors, or copy anyone’s style, or try to hang out with any of them, hear their talks and so on? If you do, others no doubt see it and can tease you mercilessly. Take a few moments to become aware of how you behave and feel. Hero-worship is a part of growing up and it will go away once you discover your own personality.

If you don’t show any signs of hero-worship and you know that you have no ‘crushes’ on anyone, then the rumours should neither bother you, nor is there any need to ‘prove’ anything to anyone. Find a good, supportive friend, preferably away from your school, with whom you can spend some leisure time and some study time. Take part in activities that help your own personality to shine. Go about your day with confidence, and the rumours will die down soon enough.

 

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There’s a guy in my school whom I like but I don’t know whether he likes me or not. I told my friend about this and she told me to tell him about my feelings – if he says ‘yes’ it’s good and if he says ‘no’ the doubt will be cleared. What do you think I should do?

You have some pretty strong feelings for this guy in your school and you’re dying to find out whether he likes you in return. But it is not just a simple matter of going up to him and telling him that you like him and asking him whether he likes you. What would you want to have happen after that?

Expressing your liking can only help you to know whether he is interested in knowing you, because liking someone you don’t yet know, and have never interacted with, is not the same as being in love. For love to grow, you need to get to know each other over a longer period of time. Also, telling someone about your feelings requires you to be vulnerable and trust that person with your feelings; this kind of trust only comes when there is a true friendship.

It makes more sense to get introduced as friends and to grow your friendship. Time will tell you whether your feelings are short-lived ones or the long-lasting kind; and also whether he truly returns your feelings.

 

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I am a girl of Std IX. I am not talking to my best friend since last year. Sometimes she tried to talk to me but I ignored her and now she is taking revenge. When I try to talk to her, she ignores me. I want to clear this matter but she is not ready. What should I do?

I can see that you want to clear the air with your friend, and it is a good step you want to take. While I’m not sure what made you both stop talking to each other in the first place, it is quite clear that both of you have taken turns at ignoring each other, so it is tit-for-tat.

If you are feeling hurt and angry right now, it is quite certain that she felt hurt, puzzled and angry when you didn’t respond to her last year, and is still feeling the same way. You both need to deal with your own hurt and to forgive.

Unfortunately, things don’t always work on demand – when you want them to. When one person is ready, the other may not be ready, and that is okay. If she doesn’t wish to speak to you, it is better to respect her wishes and to wait until she is ready to communicate. If after a certain period of time – say 3 to 6 months – if she isn’t ready, you will need to accept her decision and move on.

 

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I’m a first year engineering student. I stay in a hostel. I had very good friends in intermediate who were quite supportive and accompanied me in every situation. Now my university is quite far from home and the previous intermediate college. It’s been three months since college has started; a new place and new environment with co-education. I waited patiently to make good friends. But I have only a few classmates to spend time with and they often get busy with their work. I’m becoming emotionally weak and to get over this, I try to keep myself busy but yet end up with the same feeling. I need to make myself stronger.

It seems like you are feeling lonely in your new hostel and college, and are missing your friends and family.

From what you say, I understand that your friends in Intermediate were girls, and you spent a lot of time doing things together. But, now you are in a coed professional college, where students do a lot of independent work and are focused on their academic, and later career goals. Three months is a short time; give yourself a few more months to adjust and feel fully settled in.

When you constantly think about what is not working, it can make you feel emotionally weak. Firstly, set yourself a routine for your studies and free time. In your free time, find out what you can do on your own – going for walks, exploring the campus or shopping areas, reading, and more.

Spend time discovering what your interests and strengths are. Your interests can help you to participate in campus activities and meet like-minded people, as well as to start up a conversation. Not having a steady group can provide an opportunity to know so many more people!

Take this time on your own as a learning opportunity which will help you become a strong, independent young woman!

 

 

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I am a student of Std IX and I want to b a journalist. Even though my parents haven’t said ‘no’ to me, they do not seem happy about this career choice. They have great expectations about me becoming an engineer or a doctor. But I am passionate about becoming a journalist. Also they always doubt whether I have a boyfriend or they think I am up to something wrong. Because of this I am very stressed and depressed. I don’t know what to do.

You are really stressed about the fact that you are passionate about becoming a journalist, but that you don’t think your parents support your choice, and seem to expect something more from you.

A good way to begin is to list your talents and strengths and weaknesses. Will these be used when you become a journalist? For example, are you good at writing? Are you willing to travel and cover a story? List what you love about journalism and why you want to be a journalist. Also list down my disadvantages. If you are convinced that this is the career for you, invite your parents to a discussion. Ask them to share what they expect of you and why; hear them out. Then, share with them what makes you so passionate about journalism and try to convince them.

It must greatly distress you that your parents don’t seem to trust you with regard to having a boyfriend or ‘doing something wrong’. Reflect on and examine what it is that you are perhaps unconsciously doing to give them that impression. You are now in class IX; take charge of yourself and show them that you are responsible and trustworthy.

 

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When I was in Std 7, a boy in my class proposed to me. A year went by and now I am in Std 8 and he says he still loves me. I don’t want to be in a relationship with him but I also don’t want to hurt his feelings as a classmate. I told my mother about this and she simply says to ignore him but I don’t want to do that although I try my best to do so.

You seem to be in a dilemma about hurting the feelings of your classmate. That is thoughtful of you. However, you need to take a firm stand and show him you are not interested – both for your sake and his. It is better that he does not have any false hopes. 

You could choose to explain this to him firmly but kindly. Help him to understand that you don’t dislike him as person, but that you don’t want to be in a relationship now. When doing so, use ‘I…’ language. For example, “I would like to focus on my studies and am not interested in a relationship. I do hope you understand.” This way, you are not rejecting him, but are starting your preference, which you have every right to do.

 

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I’m a student of class 11. My interaction skill with boys, teachers or strangers is disguising; I don’t know why I try to avoid them. I love dancing and people say that I dance well but when it comes to dancing before people I can’t, my legs start to shake. I have the same problem when speaking or singing in public. I compare myself with my friends; how they score better than me even after friends; how they score better than me even after not paying attention in class and even bunking classes. I know that I’m the only one who can make myself better but I don’t know how to do it. I’m never motivated enough to change myself.

It sounds like you feel very tongue-tied and shy and experience stage fright in front of people. It looks like you don’t value yourself or believe in yourself. Since you know that you are the only one who can make yourself better, you’re off to a good start!

How about a dose of self-appreciation each morning? Look into the mirror and appreciate one thing about yourself, however small. Write it down too. By the end of two weeks, you will realize that you are unique and that it is pointless to compare yourself with someone else!

Change happens with small steps and regular practice. You could perhaps start by rehearsing a dance or a speech in front of a mirror. Then video-record yourself or perform in front of a trusted friend and ask for feedback. Then try it in front of a small group. Finally, take the risk of joining a dance or an elocution competition in your school/college.

As for your personal interaction skills, making a conversation is about starting with small talk – the weather, an event, and so on, and then asking getting others to talk – so master the art of asking open-ended questions. You could pick up a book on conversation skills such as How To Talk to Anyone by Leil Lowndes and practice in the same manner as your dance/speech.

Change is a choice that you make each moment. So, make each experience one to learn from and grow, so that you like life fully!

 

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Everyone in my family is tensed all the time – my father, my mother, my sister and myself. Money is not an issue. My parents earn well. There are no quarrels or anything. But no one really laughs heartily. Something is lacking. Can you make out what it could be? Does it have to do with the Vaastu of the house? Is it because of some part deeds – maybe in previous lives? How can one learn the art of living properly?

I do not know anything about Vaastu or the effect of the past etc. To be happy is within one’s own ability. If you want to be happy, no one can stop you from it. In some families people are little more serious than persons in other families. This is not unusual. However, if you do think that people are not ‘happy’ at home, you can look for the causes. Find out what makes them unhappy. If you know the cause, you can always remedy it. Remember, however, that ‘laughing’ by itself does not mean ‘happiness’. What makes one happy may not make another happy. Happiness is a relative term.

 

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My elder daughter is in class VIII and younger one in class III. Nowadays, when I read news reports about young school students and even mothers committing suicide because of bad performance in exams, I become very upset. How can parents keep a constant tab on their child’s mood? My second worry is, even if parents are not pushy, the school – including teachers and peers – forces them into thinking that way. I remember that in the first year of our elder child’s school we were quite carefree and thought that the child would learn at her own pace. But soon complaints started coming in – if our child lagged behind in any respect. Soon we too started worrying about our child’s performance even at nursery and KG stage. True, there are exceptional stories of a child and his/her parents not bothering about academic record and the child doing very well in some creative field or the other. But what is the way out for a normal, middle class family?

I can understand your concern at parents and children committing suicide because the child did not perform well in the exams. Performing well in studies is indeed important but it is not the end of the world. What is important is that the child learns the subjects well, has a good grasp of it, is able to concentrate upon his work, completes the assignments and keeps pace with the class. If this is ensured, the performance of the child will not be below the level at which it should be. Parents should facilitate the child to do his work at his pace and to help complete whatever is expected of him or her (without doing his work for him. Parents must be alerted to any adverse changes in the child with regard to his studies, like sudden deterioration in studies, getting very poor marks in most subjects etc. Learning at one’s pace is fine, so long as the pace is in tune with the pace expected in the school and according to his age level and the class in which he studies. One need not expect a child of class III to perform at class V or VI level. If he is keeping pace with his age and class, the school will also not bother and you as parent need not worry.

 

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